Save Yourself

I am the poster child when it comes to frustration. I get frustrated with people, situations, and even myself. But I had an epiphany this evening. I get frustrated the most with people who refuse to be saved. You can take this many ways. Saved  from Satan, from an eating disorder, from an abusive relationship, from an addiction. I just get so annoyed because I have once been in a few (not all, Praise God) of the previous situations. I have been, and still am, a sinner. I have had an eating disorder, and I am in recovery despite the fact that I still have “bad” days. Being saved from all of the above is not so simple, but it all starts with one thing: a decision.

Here is a simpler analogy: I love to travel. I desire to travel everywhere, and I’m itching to get outta this country once more, or.. at least to the West Coast. I understand that’s not something that everyone wants. But when I share my stories, my adventures, people escape for a moment. For a moment, the audience, be it my grandparents or a room full of friends, are on that adventure with me. And it sounds fun to them! Soooo why don’t you want it for yourself? Do you think you’re undeserving? Not bold enough? I just want to say, “Like, what’s the issue?”

Which… Is exactly why I get so frustrated with others. For a long time, I spent my life in such a dark place of hatred and anger. At the time it was not particularly easy to see the “light.” But one day I had enough. I was tired of starving myself. I was tired of hating every part of myself. After a long road of living with my own unhappiness, I realized that I had enough, and that my confidence had literally dissolved. I was going nowhere. I actually believe that my relationship with God is what saved me from my disorders. He loved me when I hated myself. I am so thankful that long before one simple decision to save my body that I had made another simple decision that saved my soul.

That’s how I feel about aforementioned burdens. It’s such a simple decision, but certainly not an easy process. But do you know what that simple decision holds? Promise. Promise for eternal life and love if you accept Jesus Christ into your heart. A healthier, fuller future if you choose recovery from an eating disorder or an addiction. A happier, more independent road if you choose to free yourself from an abusive relationship.

I know that people of all faiths and walks of life read this blog. I’m not telling you what to do because quite frankly, I can’t save you. You can only save yourself. What I am telling you is that if you’re struggling right now, I beg you to consider these simple decisions. What do you want? Make that decision and tell someone, and the rest will fall into place.